Many Regrets, One Hope
Luke 2:14 – “Glory to God in the highest heaven, and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.”
Being 45 years old, a lot has happened in my life. Some things I am very proud of.
In high school I did very well in the science fairs and received a decent amount of college scholarships because of it. I was really into robotics and my senior year I built a robot butler that ran off dual motorcycle batteries and was about 5’ tall. It poured drinks and vacuumed.
When I went to college, I was in a lot of different activities. I acted and did sound design for our theatre, was Production Manager at the radio station (I will forever know how to pronounce a “W” after spending years there) and my senior seminar project was producing a digital demo for a band. These days a digital demo is all too normal, but during the early 90s, digital was almost unheard of.
I became a multi-unit manager at a fairly young age with Taco Bell. Managing 3 stores, building a new one, and leading several regional task forces all by the age of 25 was awesome. That springboarded a career that led to managing 175 units across 26 states and eventually to a long, successful career at a large grocery chain and finally ending in owning my own recruiting franchise.
But along the way, I have had several moments that were not so glorious.
Because of my awkwardness in high school, I never made any close friends. Because of my busyness in college, I never really grew close to anyone there either. Because of my work schedule and strong desire to succeed (pretty much an addiction to work) I was never there for my now ex-wife and kids. My ex-wife eventually gave me up for another guy and the relationship with the kids is strained, although in some ways getting better.
But there are a LOT of days that I wish I would have done things differently.
I know what you are thinking, “But, Fred, you have an amazing life.”
You are right, God has blessed me beyond measure despite the screw ups I have done.
But that doesn’t change the fact that I wish I had changed things in my past. We all have that feeling. We have all done things that we wish were different.
But we can’t dwell on those past problems.
For myself, I need to move forward, past the issues of my lack of friends in the past and my lack of commitment to my ex-wife and over-commitment to my work.
You see, if it weren’t for those mistakes, I would not have been given the hope I have now.
It is very easy to say that in the past few years, God has turned my life around and given me more blessings than I could ever imagine. You are right, but the physical blessings are merely a vapor in this life.
As much as I love Mimi, we will both die one day and not be together.
As much as I enjoy the house we have, time will take the new house smell away and it will simply be another house.
As much as I enjoy the ministries that God has given me, all the people I minister to will disappear one way or another.
But the hope I have came in the form of a little baby.
Luke 2:15 – When the angels had left them and gone into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, “Let’s go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about.”
Not my own children, although they are blessings.
The little baby I am speaking of was born in a manger to a couple who never expected to be birthing the Savior of humanity.
But that little baby brought me hope.
Luke 2:11-12 – Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.”
That little baby was born out of love.
Not necessarily between the human parents of Jesus, but between God the Father and humanity.
For God so loved the world…
That little baby is my hope.
That little baby is the reason I have a life.
That little baby is the reason that I know that whatever regrets I have in the past, I have a future that will lead to heaven. Even though I will always feel the pain of my regrets, which will affect my happiness, my joy will always be present because my life is in Christ.
And that is more than good enough for me.
John 3:16 – For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.
Pingback: The End of an Era | boyradd